Start Bailin’

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Milt and I push his small rowboat into the lake’s calm waters on a sunny, early morning.  Fishin’ is absolutely on our minds.

Milt’s boat has stood the test of time, and she definitely looks it.  There are patches here and there, scrapped and worn paint, and even some mismatched planking on the floor.

Rowing the boat far from shore, we arrive at the very best place to fish the lake.  The deep water covers the territory with the biggest fish around.

We both become quite involved with our fishin’ as we cast again and again, hoping to catch the big one.  We fail to notice the threatening skies above.  A mother-of-all thunderstorms appears heading for the lake, and we sit directly in the crosshairs of its vicious aim.

Before we can even think about rowing back to the safety of the shore, Milt and I feel the tiny craft being engulfed by the torrents of rain and the white caps of the charging waves.

Our clothes and fishin’ tackle become soaking wet in a few short minutes, and then the boat begins to list to the starboard side.  She’s taking on water much too quickly.

Looking more anxious by the second, Milt shouts out, “Start bailin’ now!”

Watching my tackle box floating away, I yell back, “With what?”

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Flying Trash Can, Final Chapter

If you have arrived for the first time, you may want to check out the previous chapters of the story.

What lies ahead at Aaron Burr High School?  Will Pete crumble and fold up his teaching career on the very first day?  

Each of the four classrooms is separated by office-like partitions.  The walls, looking more temporary than permanent, rise about seven feet.  There is ample space between each wall and the ceiling.  Pete doesn’t appreciate the room layout much, but there is little that he can do about it.  He will have to make the best of it for now.

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The school’s mascot is the Ravens.  For Pete’s sake, it is very unfortunate that this blackbird cannot serve as  a lookout for him.  His adventures have only just begun!

Pete again surveys the room, and he feels a bit more comfortable.  Clyde still seems to be enjoying a pre-winter nap.  Traci is applying another color of polish to her perfectly manicured nails, and she wants to be finished before lunch.  The rest of the class is working quietly—at least it seems—on an assignment.

The classroom is only half full on this inaugural day of school at Aaron Burr.  It seems that many students are still on summer vacation—probably until after Labor Day.

Hmm . . . where is Reggie?

Reggie, who is as nutty as a fruit cake, has disappeared from Pete’s sight.  Pete checks out each corner of the half-empty room, but Reggie is nowhere to be seen.

Pete now begins to feel a band of cold sweat dripping down his back, but he truly has no idea what is in store for him.  Past memories take him back to the day that he was stuck in a gigantic snow drift while driving along an abandoned highway last winter.  As he was sweating it out under his heavy, winter parka, he figured that he would never be found.  Fortunately, a helpful truck driver (Pete’s guardian angel) came along and pulled his car back onto the road.

A few minutes pass.

Pete wishes that the clock would move more swiftly so that the bell will ring to end class.  He has a planning period next, and he is seriously thinking of going home.

This teaching stuff just doesn’t sit well with him.  He wonders for a minute or two why he ever changed his major from Accounting to Business Education.  Another of life’s decisions is about ready to provide Pete with another notable experience to write about in his already overflowing journal.

The clock is slowly approaching the time to wrap up the first class of his teaching career.  Pete begins thinking that perhaps the remainder of his day will turn out better.  He is feeling a bit more relaxed and confident.  Didn’t the Titanic’s captain feel confident as the huge iceberg loomed ahead?

The room grows unusually quiet.

Then . . . Suddenly!

Bam!!

A large, heavy, cast-iron trash can hurdles the wall and lands at Pete’s feet.  The airborne projectile narrowly misses Pete’s head by a couple of inches.  The flying trash can strikes terror in Pete’s inner soul, and he feels his heartbeat racing while a torrent of sweat runs free over his entire body.  He pivots around and suddenly realizes that this day really is not going to be an outstanding experience.

Pete, standing all alone in the middle of the room, is visibly shaken and greatly disturbed.  His face has turned a ghastly white color, and his blonde hair is all amiss.  He turns to face the class, and the students are all snickering.  Many are falling out of their seats and roaring with more and more laughter.  Even Clyde wakes up and joins in with the impromptu celebration.  Traci excitedly claps her hands and smudges her still-wet nail polish.

Twisting around, Pete runs quickly out of the room, down a vacant hallway, and out the front door of the school.

Reggie slyly creeps back around the wall to rejoin the class.  His thumbs-up gesture arouses even more of a deafening thunder of applause and shouts for his exploits.  Somehow, the epic sounds have not reached the central office . . . yet!

Clyde joins Reggie at the front of the room, and they both announce their marching orders for the rest of the day—“TAKE OVER THE SCHOOL!”

Without a teacher in the room, the unruly mob leaves the computer lab and launches into a riotous journey down the hallway into the rest of Aaron Burr’s no longer quiet hallways.  Another opening day has turned into a disaster of nearly Biblical proportions.  What happens next will be anyone’s guess; just be on the lookout for Reggie, the new kingpin of the school!

An hour later, the police arrive to take charge of the disorderly student body, which resembles an unruly and disorganized mob.  Meanwhile, the administration has been hiding in their offices, and the teaching staff finds refuge down in the school’s boiler room in the basement.

The bell rings to dismiss school for the day, but Pete is missing permanently.  Thoroughly shaken, he never returns to Aaron Burr.

As the curtain closes on Aaron Burr High School (this will be its final, unforgettable school year), the wrecking ball will finally arrive to turn the property into a parking lot and city park.  Many citizens around the community curiously wonder whatever happened to Pete, the novice teacher who dashed away.

Rumor has it that he is now the Principal at Alexander Hamilton High School in a distant city.  According to an inside source, all classrooms have permanent walls and include lightweight, plastic trash cans.

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Aaron Burr High School bites the dust!

Flying Trash Can, Chapter 3

If you missed either of the first two chapters, here are links to Chapters 1 and 2.

The story continues from Aaron Burr High School.  When we last checked in, the first day of school was off and running (the staff isn’t quite sure where to).

Aaron Burr’s student body is dominated by the sub-culture from the streets outside of the school building.  Sadly, the administration can do very little to control the unruly students or maintain any type of discipline.  Pete and the newly arrived staff do not see what’s coming their way—a film, with a disaster theme, would be a more appropriate setting!

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Pete’s first-period class is filled with freshmen and sophomores, with a couple of juniors thrown in because they need another failing grade.  Pete assumes (without much forethought) that his beginning class will prepare the rest of his day for even more success.  Pete looks down and suddenly realizes that his socks do not match—one black and one blue.  He feels a bead of sweat forming around the collar of his shirt.  Perhaps he should loosen up the colorful tie that hangs (too tightly) around his neck.

Reggie is one the juniors, and Pete immediately realizes that this “man-child” will be a handful to cope with.  Reggie stands nearly as tall as Shaquille O’Neill with the maturity of a middle schooler.  He aspires to play in the NBA, but no scouts will ever find his talent (or lack of it) as his GPA is a lowly 0.2.  His only passing grade was during his freshman year in Physical Education. Somehow he squeezed by with a “D-” on his final exam.

Traci and Clyde are sitting next to each other, and school is definitely not on their minds.  Clyde falls asleep at his computer—it seems that he is not quite ready for his summer vacation to end.  His preferred field of study is researching the short story written by American author, Washington Irving, Rip Van Winkle.

Traci pulls a bottle of fingernail polish out from her purse.  She decides that her nails need a touch-up.  Afterall, she wants to look her best on the first day of school.  Traci seems more interested in making a good impression with some of the boys in the classroom.

The rest of Pete’s class appears to be settling down, and most seem fairly well-prepared for their return to the boisterous halls of Aaron Burr.  Pete tries to be as calm as possible, but this first day in the trenches begins to cause him to sweat even more!

Ah!  Before one forgets, Pete’s classroom . . . aka the computer lab (prison to Reggie and many others) . . . doesn’t look like a traditional classroom.  The computer lab is part of an enormous, open classroom area with four large computer labs filling the space.  There are no windows, permanent walls, or classroom doors.

The school designers wanted to set up an office-like atmosphere so that students could better assimilate into the world of work.  One wonders how many of Aaron Burr’s finest and not so fine will actually make it in the real world, much less graduate on time.

Each of the four classrooms is separated by office-like partitions.  The walls, looking more temporary than permanent, rise about seven feet.  There is ample space between each wall and the ceiling.  Pete doesn’t appreciate the room layout much, but there is little that he can do about it.  He will have to make the best of it for now.

Flying Trash Can, Chapter 2

The story continues at Aaron Burr High School with the first day of school.  In case you missed the first chapter, here is a link to it.

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The school district, in its infinite wisdom, has provided a half-day of training on how to be “successful teachers” during the soon-to-start school year.  In reality, this much-anticipated professional development session ends up being pretty much a total waste of time.  Pete remembers a few of his boring and totally inept professors from his university days.

Perhaps Pete and the staff would be better served to use “Welcome Back, Kotter” as an orientation for what is in store for all of them.  They could watch past episodes of this iconic television series.  Learning from the shenanigans and antics of Vinnie Barbarino, Arnold Horshack, and the rest of the Gabe Kotter’s dysfunctional classroom headaches, they would be better served than recalling educational psychology in an aging textbook from their college days.

Last year’s senior class graduated less than half of its students.  Therefore, the entire school has been placed on third-degree probation by the State Education Department.  A “perfect storm” sets up the school year to be an impending disaster for Pete and his very “green” and unproven colleagues.

The opening day of school arrives without much fanfare.  Pete feels both nervous and excited—dearly wanting to jumpstart his teaching career on a positive note.  Hmm, does anyone hear a bulldozer’s engine running behind the school (ready to begin demolishing the ancient building)?  Well, maybe not quite yet!

Aaron Burr’s student body is dominated by the sub-culture from the streets outside of the school building.  Sadly, the administration can do very little to control the unruly students or maintain any type of discipline.  Pete and the newly arrived staff do not see what’s coming their way—a film, with a disaster theme, would be a more appropriate setting!

Flying Trash Can, Chapter 1

This short story was originally published in its entirety in November, 2018.  The story will be reposted in smaller segments over the next several days.  Enjoy a bit of humor and sarcasm in this fictional account, which does have a bit of truth lingering behind the words.

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Photo by Marta Branco on Pexels.com

Pete arrives at Aaron Burr High School eager to kick off his teaching career.  He is a first-year teacher who is feeling more than a tad edgy as he begins teaching high school students.

His preparedness from the university is masked by his nervousness and anxiety.  Sometimes, he feels more like when he was standing in the batter’s box as a 12-year old, and he struck out with the bases loaded to end the game in defeat!  He asks himself over and over again, “Will I really make it as a teacher?”

Why the community named its high school after Aaron Burr is a bit of a mystery.  Afterall, about the only milestone ever noted about him in history is that he prevailed in a duel with Alexander Hamilton many, many years ago.

Nonetheless, Pete sets up his classroom with both apprehension and enthusiasm as he spends two days preparing it for the first day of school, which is arriving soon.  His classroom is a computer lab where he will teach students in the applications of Microsoft Office in their personal and working lives (now that is mouthful of expectations).

He sometimes wonders why he could not have been the entrepreneur behind Microsoft’s enormous success instead of Bill Gates.  Pete remains a big dreamer who hopes one day to make it to the top!

He is unaware of the challenges that are secretly waiting for him, just as a snake waits to spring upon its prey.  Being a “rookie” teacher and a bit naïve, Pete is walking into a miserable swamp instead of an honored school.  Nearly all of the teaching staff is new to Aaron Burr.  As the opening bell awaits, they may remember the maiden and ill-fated voyage of the ocean liner Titanic.

Thank you for reading.  Over the next several days, be looking for more details about the first day of school at Aaron Burr High School.

Afternoon Rendezvous

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The pace of work at Bill’s office has recently been too much to bear.  Laboring for countless hours to land a substantial account for his marketing business, he has been working diligently, nearly nonstop, with little time off.

Viewing a beautiful day outside of his office window, Bill checks his calendar.  All looks free for an afternoon rendezvous with one of his favorite places . . . a splendid, quiet 18 holes on the golf course.

As he quietly slips away from the office, Bill instructs his secretary to hold down the fort . . . “Please keep the boss off of my back for three hours.”

About two hours later, Bill’s boss shows up.  He needs to catch up with Bill about this new account.  Let’s eavesdrop on the conversation between the boss and Bill’s ever-protective secretary.

The boss asks the secretary, “Where’s Bill at?  I need to check on his progress with our newest account.”

She dutifully replies, “He’s working on his game.”

“What game?”

“He’s working hard to land this new account that’s better than par.”

“Well, I hope he keeps his eyes focused on the prize, just like an eagle.”

“Oh, I’m sure he’s looking for lots of birdies, perhaps an eagle or two.”

As the boss leaves the office, he turns around and smiles, “Bill really is my ‘ace in the hole’ around here.”

Meanwhile at this same moment on the golf course, Bill tees off on the short, par-3, 13th hole.  His ball carries straight and true, lands softly on the green, and meanders right into the hole.

A hole-in-one . . . an ACE!

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Incredible!

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Autumn fills with sounds of cheering fans and the excitement of Friday night high school football games.  We pick up the action with play-by-play announcer “Cato the Cat” Johnson as he calls the final seconds of the game between the undefeated Valley High Bulldogs and the lowly Vernon High Bengals.

Welcome back football fans as the undefeated Valley High Bulldogs are poised to garner their 10th division championship in a row.  The winless Bengals of Vernon High have put up an incredible fight against overwhelming odds tonight, but their time in the limelight is about to be extinguished by the mighty Bulldogs.

The Bulldogs are poised to add to their lead with the score at 7-2.  The stingy Bengals have only yielded one score, and its defense has scored their only points with a safety back in the first quarter.

From the Bengals five-yard line, the Bulldogs are facing a second down and goal.  They line up in their favorite power run formation.  The ball is snapped.  But wait . . . fumble!

The Bengals have recovered!  Oh my, what a turn of events.  However, the Bulldogs still hold the lead, and the game clock only shows enough time for one more play.

The Bengals face nearly the entire length of the football field—95 yards to be exact.  With only one more play, it appears their woeful season will end on another sour note.  At least the marching band has performed quite well this season.

The Bengals line up in a spread formation.  The Bulldogs’ defense sets up in a prevent mode.  They only need to stop the Bengals here, and their string of championship crowns will continue.

The ball is snapped.  Instead of passing, the Bengals hand the ball off to their speedy halfback Kurt Warner.  With a power sweep to the right, the Bengals are pushing the ball up the sideline.  There is a phalanx of blockers in front of Warner.

Only two players stand between the Bengals and a touchdown.  One blocker takes out a defender, and Warner fakes left and hustles right, leaving the last tackler humbled on the ground.

Nelson is on his way . . . to the 30, the 20, the 10 . . . touchdown!!

The Bengals score, and the game is over.  Vernon High 8, Valley High 7.

Oh my football fans!  We have seen an incredible finish for the ages.

Life isn’t always as basic as a seemingly simple high school football game.  Just as Vernon High comes into the game as a hapless underdog, Jesus Christ is perceived to be a loser and an underdog when he is taken to Calvary and a cruel Cross.  Football fans underestimate the resolve of the Bengals, just as people underestimate Christ’s purpose.

The Vernon High team experiences an unbelievable moment, but it pales in comparison to the stunning moment when Jesus’ followers find the empty tomb. 

Incredible!

 

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Filling the Freezer

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“The freezer will be full of meat this winter,” Pete tells his skeptical wife as he heads to the mountains for his annual elk hunting trip.

Montana’s Big Hole Valley offers some of the best elk habitat in America.  Pete has been preparing for his fall elk hunting trip over the summer, and he plans to bag a large bull elk this fall to fill up the home’s deep freeze with delicious and tasty elk meat.

In scouting the mountains, Pete knows exactly where the elk will be when he returns for bow hunting season.  Armed with his very effective and precise compound bow, he knows success is just one accurate shot away.

Hiking into the mountains, Pete stakes out a familiar area and waits quietly in the tall grass and brush.  The anticipation builds as his body stays on high alert.  The nervous tension only adds to the anxiousness of the hunt.

Suddenly, an enormous bull elk wanders through the trail, just as Pete expects.  His position provides a nearly perfect angle and distance.  He takes careful aim with his bow, pulling it back with careful precision.

Plummeting to the ground with a groaning thud goes Pete!

The arrow flies harmlessly into the trees.  Pete’s shoulder has popped out, and the throbbing sting is excruciating.  He rolls around on the ground in acute pain.

Deliberately and triumphantly walking past the stricken bow hunter, the elk looks down at him with a slightly confident look as if to say, “I guess your freezer will be empty again this winter.”

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Lost in the Woods, Chapter 3

Here is the final chapter in this three-part story.  In case you missed the first two chapters of “Lost in the Woods,” here are the links to them.

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The shadows of the early evening begin to change the look and feel of the woods.  Grandpa Ted has been making steady progress towards the cabin.  He expects to reach it in about an hour.

Without warning, his right foot fails to notice a big hole hidden in the grass.  Down goes Ted in pain and agony!

His ankle feels like it is broken, but he assumes it is more likely sprained.  Standing up very gingerly and a bit off balance, he tests the injured ankle.  It hurts like a son-of-a-gun, but he pushes onward.  Not even an injured leg will keep him from finding Pete and Willy before dark.

Another night sky arrives, and the brothers are still feeling the ill effects of eating too many huckleberries much too quickly.  Willy asks his older brother, “What are we going to do?”

Pete, feeling just as scared, answers back, “We need to keep believing.  Help is coming.”

As the sun sets and darkness curls around the cabin, the brothers look out the open doorway of the cabin.  From the edge of the clearing, a narrow beam of light comes from the woods.  A shadowy man hobbles towards the boys.  Pete yells out, “It’s Grandpa!”

Pete and Willy run out to meet their Grandpa.  They are smiling and talking so fast that Grandpa can barely say a word.  Finally, the reunion settles down, and the grandsons realize their Grandpa Ted is injured.  They take care of him the best they can.

With Grandpa’s help, the boys start a small fire in the fireplace.  They find the food in Grandpa’s backpack, and everyone enjoys a feast of cold beans with fire-grilled Spam from a can.  “The best feast ever!” both grandsons admit at the same time.

The brothers and their Grandpa settle in for a night of sleep in the cabin.  By dawn, all are awake and eager to begin the journey home.  Grandpa’s ankle is badly swollen.  Willy finds a longer, sturdy tree branch—just the perfect tool—for Grandpa to use as a crutch.  Pete will carry the now much lighter backpack.  Together, the grandsons will make sure their Grandpa Ted makes it back home, too.

Following Grandpa’s internal compass, the trio makes steady, yet slow progress in their morning walk towards home.  The love of each for the other will insure all make it back safely.  God has indeed been watching over all three of them.

They finally arrive at home, and Mom and Dad are overjoyed to see their two sons.  Everyone is exhausted and in need of some much needed warm food, a shower, and some rest.

The time is 11:52.  Grandpa Ted promised to have the boys home back by Noon, and he is good to his word.

At last report, Grandpa is mending at home for several weeks.  The badly swollen ankle is indeed broken!

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Lost in the Woods, Chapter 2

This is the second chapter of a three-part story.  If you missed the first chapter, follow this link to catch up on the story:  Lost in the Woods, Chapter 1.

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With daylight growing shorter, Grandpa Ted gathers a few necessary supplies for his rescue mission.  He quickly and efficiently fills a medium-size backpack with water, food, matches, first-aid supplies, and a flashlight.

As he departs, Ted tells his daughter, “We’ll be back by Noon tomorrow.”  She and her husband hope so, yet they feel plenty of apprehension running through their already frail emotions.

Unaware about Grandpa being on his way, Pete and Willy are growing restless.  Having no food or water, the brothers decide to venture out from the cabin—but not too far.  As they search for anything to quench their thirsts or fill their empty stomachs, the boys cannot help but think of their dire situation.

With his intimate knowledge of the woods, Grandpa Ted hopes his grandsons have found the old cabin.  He knows it will provide them with basic shelter as well as a safe refuge.

Moving as quickly as his ancient legs can walk, Ted soon realizes he will need to pace himself.  His 63-year old body begins to remind him that he is no longer a young man.

The brothers discover a creek during their search, and they bury their faces in the cool water for several long drinks.  Up ahead along the creek, Pete spots some bushes which are loaded with wild huckleberries.

The boys plunge into the bushes as their hunger screams for more and more huckleberries.  Eating too quickly, they consume far more berries than their stomachs can safely digest.  Feeling sick, the brothers finally make it back to the safety of the cabin—looking pale and ready to drop.

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Photo courtesy of The Evergreen State College in Olympia, Washington.

Stay tuned for the final chapter.  Be prepared for a few twists in the action as Grandpa Ted and his grandsons hope to be reunited.