Cold Cash

Photo by John Guccione on

A bewildered and frustrated Sgt. Joe Friday has been working on a cold case for several weeks. 

Despite his best efforts, the renowned detective can’t pin the rap on Willy Martin, a notorious bank robber.  A cool $100,000 has been snatched away from the First National Bank, all in large bills (aka “Benjamin Franklin’s $100).  

Sitting at his desk and checking his notes, Friday’s thoughts keep coming back to the same pattern of thinking.  Since the money remains hot, it is very doubtful that Willy Martin has put any of the money back into circulation.  He’s been under surveillance for weeks, but he hasn’t made any suspicious moves.

Every Saturday morning, Friday meets up with his retired partner, Bill Gannon.  They hang out at their favorite coffee shop and trade war stories from their past cases.

Bill is telling a story about a funny situation which recently took place in Ohio.  He recalls the situation, “A grandmother’s $25,000 went missing from her home.  It was her life savings.”

Friday continues listening, but he is just about filled up with coffee and conversation.  His mind keeps working overtime on the cold case.

Bill’s version of the story begins to become more interesting to his former partner, “No one knew where the money went.  Her grandchildren helped clean her house one day.  They were very thorough, even emptying out the old, spoiled food from her refrigerator and freezer.”

Friday eagerly waits for the story’s finale, as Bill wraps it up, “Her money was stored in the freezer in an envelope, and it was accidentally thrown away.  Fortunately, the trash truck operator found the cold cash before it ended up at the landfill.”

“Bingo!  Cold cash!”  Friday jumps up and thanks Bill for the hot tip.  As his good friend hustles out the door, Bill wonders what is really up. 

On Monday, he heads across town to ask a judge for another search warrant.  The warrant is for Willy Martin’s grandma’s house, more specifically her freezer.  There is a large chest freezer submerged in the depths of her basement.

When Friday shows up at grandma’s door, she seems a bit shocked to see him again.  After all, he searched the entire house several days ago, and nothing was found.  Except, this time the determined Sgt. Friday remembers the freezer in the basement.

With the efficiency of a well-seasoned detective, Friday quickly removes the contents from the overflowing freezer.  Hiding at the bottom of the freezer is a false floor.  He tears open the heavy cardboard to find several envelopes hiding out down below.

As he checks the contents of several sealed envelopes, he discovers the missing loot.  All $100,000 of it!  Even Benjamin Franklin is winking back at the detective, “Honesty is the best policy.”

The detective reads grandma her rights.  Then she suddenly begins singing like a parakeet, “I never knew what Willy put in my freezer.  Honest Sgt. Friday.  He promised me everything was okay while he stayed hidden from the heat, who was checking on his every move.”

Sgt. Friday replies back, “Well, crime doesn’t pay when you are asked to take the heat for hiding someone else’s cold cash.”

While the storied detective calls to make arrangements for officers to pick up Willy Martin, he finally begins to relax.  This challenging cold case has been solved.


Photo by Alex Barnes on

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